Narcissists are people who are in love of a grandiose and idealized image of themself. This love of their inflated self image arises from their need to avoid deep sense of insecurity about themselves. A person suffering from NPD or narcissistic personality disorder has self-centered behaviors, arrogant thinking, and an excessive need for admiration. They lack consideration and empathy for other people. Such people are often described as selfish, cocky, manipulative, demanding and patronizing by other people. It can be difficult to deal with narcissist individuals.

How to Deal with a Narcissist in the Best Ways


Determine the type of narcissist

There are two types of narcissists: grandiose and vulnerable. Grandiose narcissists tend to be more extroverts, happier and more stable emotionally. On the other hand, vulnerable narcissists are less agreeable, less stable emotionally and are more manipulative and have psychopathic characteristics.

Vulnerable ones don’t feel good about their own selves at heart. They don’t show their emotions easily; hence, you may not be able to realize when they are getting in your way or undercutting you. If you want to put people either in your family or in your work team to their best use, then the grandiose types may be your best friend-as long as you are able to put that individual on board with the overall goals of your group.


Try to understand

How to deal with a narcissist? The key is to strike a balance. Once you are able to recognize that their behavior is due to the insecurity, you can give them enough forgiveness and only focus on the job that needs to be finished. However, keep in mind that by backing off too much you will give air to their egocentric flames. Hence, the right amount of understanding is important.


Accept that they have limitations

If the person you are dealing is important to you, then you have to accept their narcissism. Don’t ask for attention or support from them as they are not able to provide that. If you insist, you might not get anything but become more annoyed, disappointed and frustrated, which will ultimately damage the relationship more.


Evaluate the situation

Narcissism is not a personality trait that is either present or absent. An individual’s insecurities may be elicited by some situations more than the others. For instance, someone did not get a promotion he/she deserves and now has to work for the individual who just got the job. This situation will gradually worsen insecurities over time and he/she will become vindictive, defensively narcissistic and spiteful. If you have to interact with such a person, it is imperative to remember that certain situation has aided in creating the monster and you’d better have mercy.


Keep a positive outlook

How to deal with a narcissist? If you have to deal with narcissists who obtain pleasure from watching sufferings of others, then seeing you in pain they have caused will only result in increasing their aggressive behavior towards you. Even if you feel frustrated and annoyed, don’t look like that and eventually you will see that their annoying behavior will reduce in frequency.


Don’t get derailed from your goals

It becomes easy to get derailed from your own goals or lose your sense of purpose when a narcissist takes center stage. Keep in mind to not pay attention to everything this individual does or says, no matter what they do to claim your attention. Try to find the intricate balance between moving towards your goals and relieving the vulnerable narcissist’s insecurities and anxieties. If the narcissist is of grandiose type, then you may have to acknowledge their feelings but then move ahead towards your goals.


Maintain sense of humor

Without being rude, you can point out with a joke about the narcissist’s words or behavior. This works especially for grandiose narcissist, who may probably find it instructive and entertaining.


Know when the narcissist individual may need help

How to deal with a narcissist? Despite the belief that personality is non-changeable, research done by scientists demonstrates that even long term behaviors of people can be changed. If necessary, try to convince the narcissist individual to take professional help. Both group therapy and individual psychotherapy have their own benefits and have demonstrated to help narcissistic people regulate their behavior and visualize other individuals as people who are also as important as they are.


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