Emotions can be devastating. They can transform you into an energetic being in one moment and a devouring devil in another. However, whatever emotion does to our personality depends all upon how much we allowed it to control us.
What feeling sucks the most? Letting go! Getting past a breakup is like getting rid of drug addiction. However, you certainly cannot allow yourself to dwell in that demeaning sensitivity for so long. You eventually need to get over it at some point of your life. Hence, we bring to you some authentic and helpful ways of dragging yourself out of it.
Devastated After Breakup, What to Do?
Deal with the pain 'all at once':
"You got rejected. You lost a person whom you wanted to spend your life with. You are now alone. You have lost the romantic aspect of your living." Deal with all these kinds of thoughts and pains all at once. Life is too short, and you certainly do not have much time in considering all the associated grieves one by one. Let the pain hit you once and for all. Ignoring it will only delay the feelings which are likely to affect you anytime soon. Hence, cry altogether for once and let the mortifying feelings wane away naturally. Do not force happiness upon yourself unless you are not ready for it.
Find something that isn't romantic
You have recently ended up a romantic relationship, and having similar scenes going on in front of you, may it be in the form of a television show or in the form of friends who are couples, would ultimately result in you remembering your life with your ex again. Hence you need to switch these moments for a while and surround yourself with something that isn't romantic.
Stay away from your ex
Your ex isn't a character from a melodrama who is going to come back to you all messed up and ask for your forgiveness. That seldom happens. So here is an extremely useful advice that can help you recover very soon from the storm of mortifying feelings. Cut off all sorts of contact with that person such as over the phone or the social media. Just unfriend them. If you do not do so, you will then continue stalking them to check if they are merrier than you at any point. Such an act is in no way a healthy thing to do.
Be the change
Do not wait for miracles to happen. A change isn't going to show up at your door anytime. You have to be the change yourself. You need to breathe. Plan a trip, a holiday, or maybe an outing. Get some renovations in your lifestyle, but do not depend entirely upon them. Changes are only meant to ward away depression, and recovery will take its own time. Changing your surroundings should not mean to run away. Do it only for the sake of relief.
Connect with people
You are a living being and you are meant to connect with species of your kind. You would apparently like to cut off with the world for some time to allow yourself to mourn until you feel better. But isolation should not be for long. As soon as you think you are ready to mingle in social gatherings, start meeting your family and friends, for no one should remain devastated after breakup for so long.
Alcohol isn't the solution, nor is milk. But choosing for the healthier stuff will naturally ward off mental depression. Go explore tasty meals or join a workout group. You’ll find out there are way more fun things to do than being miserable.
Don't try to be friends with your ex
Staying friends with your ex is like staying back in a room that has caught fire, so that if the fire couldn't kill you, the smoke can do the task. Staying back as friends is not a good option at all. Do not consider it anytime. Move on with your life. You shall meet thousands of friends who may be actually worth of your time.
Holding onto grudges is another way of letting your ex occupy a considerable space in your mind. Hence, if you are devastated after breakup because your partner had cheated on you or done wrong to you, it is better to forgive and forget rather than keeping all the hatred in your mind. You are your own priority, and spending that time into thinking about how bad your ex was isn't going to benefit at all.
Get some hobbies
Reschedule your routine. Add healthy activities such as exercising, painting, bike riding, or anything that makes you appreciate your life. This way you will be investing more time in healing yourself rather than thinking about your ex.
Lack of sleep leads to depression, and vice versa. So make sure that you are getting enough sleep to work out normally the next day.
Do not overdo it!
Excess of anything is bad, especially in this period that is accompanied by bitter sensations. Try not to oversleep just for forgetting bad memories. Such an act will make you incapable of improving your mood and health.
Remember: it isn't the right time for big decisions
Whatever you do to bring yourself up after having been devastated after breakup, make sure that it benefits you on a long term basis. Carving out tattoos or stuff of such sort isn't a smart idea. You are indulged in depression temporarily, and making big and permanent decisions isn't going to help with anything. Let everything fall into place naturally. Do not take any step that will make you regret afterwards.
Know that You Are Not Alone
You do not have some ultra rare condition that is untreatable. You are 'devastated after breakup,' a situation through which millions of people go through or are destined to at some point of their lives. Hence, try to understand the fact that like everyone else, you too are going to defeat this desolating situation anyhow. Try to observe people who have moved on positively after breaking up with their partners. Try to learn their steps, but do not follow them completely. Surround yourself with optimism and consider yourself as a solution-oriented strong person rather than a deadbeat.